A Key Term

A key term in Buddhism is emptiness, and that might sound like a terrible thing. Ordinarily, we associate emptiness with depression and despair. A good life is a full life, we believe. An empty life would be one we haven’t filled with love, friendship, accomplishment and joy.

But stop to think how often things that fill our lives can make us feel less happy, less connected and less free. How many items in your basement or garage could you have easily done without? In the middle of a hectic day, how often have you wanted to catch your breath when you simply didn’t have a minute to spare? What did you miss when you couldn’t look around?

Sometimes our desire for a full life conflicts with our need to give ourselves a little space and an opportunity to grow and learn. The impulse to fill up every corner of our lives can mask a deeper reflex of distrust we don’t normally permit ourselves to see. When a conversation lags, we can feel anxious inexplicably, and we might say anything to escape the uncomfortable silence. Or when your kids are stuck at home because a heavy snow has shut down the schools, you might find yourself tensing up. How can you keep them busy for the day?

But if we give ourselves a little space — a little bit of emptiness — the moments that leave us at loose ends can open up new possibilities. Sitting in silence across from your friends, you might suddenly become aware of how much you value their company. Home with your kids on a snowy day, you could be deeply moved by noticing how quickly they have grown and how soon they’ll move away. You might decide to do something new, like walking together in the snow.

To the Buddhist way of thinking, emptiness is the space of possibility. In the tradition of Buddhism, the tradition known as Zen, we actually meditate on emptiness. To try it, you probably should sit down on a cushion or a chair, ideally with your back held straight and your palms folded in your lap. Then you should calmly watch your breath as it goes in and out. You’ll notice that your mind quickly veers away from the breath and rushes back to your familiar thinking. You’ll find yourself planning the next meal or rewatching “Downton Abbey” in your head or worrying about the dental bills. But if you keep returning gently to your breath, you eventually will reach a place where the thoughts diminish. Now, as you continue to breathe attentively, you will begin to feel that spaciousness.

When the Buddha was asked to describe his awakened state of mind, he would sometimes say, “I am always at the beginning.” Most people didn’t understand because they didn’t meditate and they hadn’t heard about emptiness. But when meditators reach that empty space, it’s like starting all over again. Everything becomes fresh and clear. No matter how blocked or trapped you feel, you see that anything is possible.

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