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The key is your awareness. When awareness deepens all those patterns you mentioned will weaken. There’s already a considerable amount of awareness in this questioner. The awareness isn’t the person, but it’s deeper than the person. You apply the awareness to the present moment when things arise, but not in some abstract way, for example, “Will I ever become a person who is not negative? I can’t get rid of my patterns,” that doesn’t matter; this moment is what matters. So just apply your awareness to this moment; you can’t change things into mental constructs – “How can I change, I don’t want to be that kind of person anymore?” Forget it! This moment is where you apply Presence. “The sword of Presence that cuts through time.”

Wherever you are, be there totally. If you find your here and now intolerable and it makes you unhappy, you have three options: remove yourself from the situation, change it, or accept it totally.”

Just the knowledge that you have options when in an unpleasant situation creates power inside you.

You always have a choice, and even if the choice is to accept the current situation then you’re still acting from a position of power.

Awareness of the anxiety you’re feeling is the first step to getting your power back.

Death is a stripping away of all that is not you. The secret of life is to ‘die before you die’ — and find that there is no death.”

Anxiety often comes from the desire to control what’s happening in your life.

Yet if you truly meditate on death – and accept that you’re going to leave everything behind – it can create a truly liberating feeling.

It’s liberating because you start to see that the things you see as important become much less important.

You let go of the illusion that you are able to control life.

Let Parminder share with you her own experience of anxiety.

My mother was on death bed. My and her relationship was not daughter and mother but as my best friends. She and I use to share everything. With each others consent only we take decision.

Seeing her in death bed as a doctor and daughter, I was undergoing lot of emotional stress. This was creating anxiety in me. At that time my friend came and told something about my mom that “her advice in certain circumstances help her so much that today also I feel her(My Mom’s) presence in my life.”

Immediately it struck me that besides her physical presence she has given me so much which death cannot take away from me. Death of the body will be there but her presence in my life will be there will me forever.

I immediately calm down. When she passed away there was tears were there in my eyes but no anxiety, but it was silence. Just the reminder and awareness of her presence for ever I calm down. This is the power of awareness.

I accepted the death of my mom…. Acceptance removes my anxiety…

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