Sharing At Different Ages
Toddlers
Your two-year-old probably doesn’t have an understanding of what sharing is. In general, young toddlers believe they’re the centre of the world and that everything belongs to them. For sharing, children also need to be able to manage their emotions, and toddlers are only starting to learn how to do this.
So consequences for not sharing probably won’t help your toddler learn to share. Instead, encouragement and practice will work better.
When another child has something your toddler really wants, your child will probably find it very hard to wait her turn. She might even try to get the toy any way she can, or have a tantrum if she can’t get what she wants.
Preschoolers
By age three, many children are beginning to understand about turn-taking and sharing. For example, your preschooler will probably understand that sharing equally is the ‘fair’ thing to do, but he still might not be keen to put sharing into action when it comes to giving something up. He might also still be impatient when waiting his turn.
You can build your preschooler’s sharing skills by watching for and praising good turn-taking, encouraging fairness and explaining about sharing. Simple activities that involve sharing and taking turns like kicking soccer goals or shooting basketball hoops can be helpful.
If there’s trouble, it can help to remind your preschooler how she’d feel if someone took her toy, or didn’t let her have a turn. Talking to her about other people’s feelings will help her understand things from someone else’s point of view – this is also an important skill in making friends.
It’s a good idea to be realistic about a preschooler’s ability to share. At this age, most children are still learning and can find it hard to understand other people’s thoughts and emotions.
School-age children
By the time most children start school, they’re beginning to understand that other people have feelings too. This means they’re more likely to share and take turns, although it might still be hard for them to share a favourite toy or game.
School-age children also have a strong sense of fairness and might not want to share a toy or a play a game if they think they won’t get a fair go. It might help to check the rules of the games your child is playing, and reassure your child and others that they’ll all get a turn.
At this age, your child will be much more patient and tolerant than he used to be. He’ll also be keen to do the right thing and can form more complex relationships, which really helps with the idea of sharing. Your child can get lots of practice sharing at school too – for example, sharing pencils at his desk or sharing paints in art.
Tags: Sharing
