Becoming Self Aware
1: Consider who you’ve become and what defines you. Over the course of our lives, we go acquire deeper levels of psychological awareness. During adolescence, we form our identities and our self-image becomes more robust. Spend time reflecting on what you’ve become, what values you hold most dear, and what your defining traits are.
Ask yourself, “What sets me apart from others? What characteristics make up my essence? What are some key life experiences that have made me who I am?”
Examples of traits and values could include humor, honesty, or loyalty. A skill like singing or an athletic ability could be an important part of who you are.
Remember to be open to more than just positive attributes. When you’re reflecting on who you are, be open to things about yourself that might not be the best qualities. For example, you might ask yourself, “How is my laziness or temper a part of me? How do these attributes fit into my overall being, and what do I desire to change about myself?”
2: Reflect on the differences between your ideal self and actual self. Think about how you represent yourself to others, especially as you consider the attributes that make you proud and those you’d like to change.
Ask yourself, “What are the differences between how I represent myself to others and how I perceive myself? Do I let others define me too much? How can I integrate, or unify, the ideal self that I show others and the actual self I try to keep to myself?”
Look for the differences by questioning how you think about yourself versus how you act in person. For example, “Do I tend to present myself as flawed by constantly joking about my awkwardness or how I look?” or “Do I mislead people about what I do in my free time because I’m embarrassed about my real life?”
3: Keep a journal to track your journey of self-awareness. Psychologists agree that self-awareness is a dynamic, changing process. We shift between degrees of self-awareness, self-deception, and everything in between. [1] Try keeping a daily journal and write a daily self-reflection to keep a record of your journey.
Write down a few details about your day, how you interacted with others, and recall your reactions and feelings about the day’s various happenings. You might write, for example, “Today I ran into James and we ended up having a disagreement. He said something that I thought was an underhanded way of insulting me, so I called him on it immediately. It escalated, and we ended the conversation on really bad terms.”
Choose a regular time, whether every couple weeks or once a month, to read your past entries. You might read back an entry and think or write in response, “After a couple weeks’ distance, I’ve realized that James probably wasn’t trying to offend me. Reading my entry back, I realize I probably jumped to conclusions. Observing this conversation with a little distance has given me the motivation to try to smooth things over with James.”
Try not to feel embarrassment or self-judgment when you read things you wrote, but try to be open to learning about yourself. Observe yourself taking shape with each experience. Open yourself up to being aware of how you react to various situations, how your feelings respond to interactions, and how those responses in turn shape you into the person you are.
Tags: Challenger Great Warrior
