Never Escape From Problems

Question to Osho – YOU HAVE SPOKEN OF THE UNION OF THE SUN AND MOON WITHIN ONESELF AND GOING BEYOND. IT FEELS LIKE HAVING A MATE OUTSIDE ONESELF MAYBE MORE COMPLICATION AND TROUBLE THAN IT IS WORTH.

WILL YOU PLEASE SPEAK ON HOW HAVING A MATE OR NOT ENHANCES OR DETRACTS FROM ONE’S INWARDNESS AND SPIRITUAL DEVELOPMENT.

The question is not; of complication. The question is of richness, of experience. It is going to be complicated. Alone you are complicated; when you find a girlfriend or a boyfriend, a man or a woman, of course two complicated beings come together. And it is not going to be a simple addition; it is. going to be a multiplication. Things become complicated, certainly.

But through that complexity you have to find a way. It is a challenge. Each woman you come in contact with, or man, is a great challenge. You can avoid those challenges. That’s what monks have always been doing – escape from the world, avoid the challenge. Of course you will feel more still, silent, your life will not be complicated; but you will be poor. And when I say “poor,” I mean you will be very, very inexperienced, immature.

Because from where will you get the maturity? From where will you get that enrichment that life and experience bring? And there is no other way – it cannot be purchased, it cannot be borrowed. It is not hidden in the Himalayas so you can go and dig it up; it is not there. It is in life, it is with people, it is in relationships.

So I know it is complicated, but just for complications’ sake if you think that it will be better to be alone, your aloneness is not going to be spiritual. It will be the aloneness of a coward, not of a brave man.

Let me tell you one anecdote.

A man who was very hard of hearing went to see his doctor, who examined him thoroughly and told him he was in good shape for a man of seventy.

“Do you smoke?” asked the doctor.

“What do you say?” asked the old man.

“I said, do you smoke!” yelled the doctor.

“Oh, yes,” said the old man.

“Much?” inquired the doctor.

“Who?” said the old man.

“Do you smoke much?” said the doctor.

“Cigarettes, cigars, and sometimes a pipe. Yes, I am smoking all the time,” he told him.

“Drink?” asked the doctor.

“It is after nine,” replied the old man.

“No, no,” said the doctor. “Do you drink?”

“Oh, yes, I will drink anything,” he said.

“I suppose you keep late hours? Lots of parties? Like girls?” The doctor was getting a little annoyed by now.

“Sure thing! And I intend to carry on like this for a long time.”

“Well,” said the doctor, “I am afraid you will have to cut it all out.”

“What?” yelled the old man, more in surprise than lack of hearing.

“You will have to cut it all out!” the doctor yelled.

“Just to hear better?” said the old man. “No thanks!”

Just to avoid complexities? No, never. That is the way of the coward. Never escape from problems. They are helpful, tremendously helpful. They are growth situations.

And if you are going to find a girl, don’t try to find a cow. It will be less complicated, again. Find a real woman, who will give you all sorts of troubles. Your mettle will be tested there.

A young man asked Socrates, “Should I get married, sir?” And of course he asked Socrates because he must have been thinking not to get married. And, then, he found the right man to ask because Socrates had suffered so much with his woman. She was really terrible – a crocodile. She had been beating Socrates, she had poured a kettle of tea over his face and had burned him – half his face remained burned his whole life. Such a beautiful man, such a beautiful person like Socrates, and he had found a very terrible woman. So this young man asked. Socrates said, “Yes, if you listen to me, get married. There are two possibilities. If the wife is like mine, you will become a great philosopher like me. And if you get a beautiful wife, of course you will enjoy your life. Both possibilities are good.” He said, “You will become a great philosopher like me.” Just continuous nagging – it is a great help to meditation. By and by one starts feeling unattached. One has to. One starts feeling, “This is all illusion, maya.” So don’t avoid complexities in life, because life means complexities. Learn, pass through them, because that is the only way to grow.

A tramp knocked at a door which was opened by a large, muscular, hard-faced woman.

“Get out of here, you miserable tramp!” she yelled. “If you don’t clear off I will call my husband.”

“I think not,” was the calm response of the tramp. “He is not at home.”

“How do you know that?” asked the woman.

“Because,” said the tramp, “when a man marries a woman like you he is at home only at meal times.”

Question to Osho – NOW I FEEL, UNLESS ONE IS READY, NOTHING IS POSSIBLE. I HAVE BEEN SEEKING THE KEY FOR MANY YEARS; I ASKED YOU ALSO MANY TIMES, BUT YOU REMAINED SILENT. ONE DAY SUDDENLY YOU DELIVERED ME THE KEY, OSHO.

NOW THE KEY IS WITH ME. BUT I AM FINDING MYSELF UNABLE TO UNLOCK. BLOCKS ARE IN ME. I HAVE THE KEY, I HAVE THE LOCKS BEFORE ME, AND EVEN THEN WHAT IS THIS HAPPENING? YOU ARE PRESENT; SEE MY HELPLESSNESS. ONCE I USED TO THINK THAT I HAD NOT THE KEY, AND WAS DISTURBED; NOW I HAVE THE KEY AND AM MORE DISTURBED.

PLEASE HELP, OSHO; I KNOW YOU ARE ALWAYS HELPING. OBSTACLES ARE IN ME. PLEASE TELL ME HOW TO REMOVE THOSE, SO THAT… SO THAT….

The first thing: the key that I have delivered to you is a false key. Because the real key cannot be delivered. You have to attain it, earn it. Because you were after me so much, so I said, “Okay, have this.” Now don’t go on knocking your head against the wall. Throw that key. Nothing is wrong with you; the key is false.

All keys are false. Because the lock is yours. How can you find the key from somebody else? The lock is you! You have to create the key within you, as you have created the lock.

And once you have created the key, the lock disappears; it is not that the key has to open it. Once you know, the problem disappears. Not that you have to bring your knowledge to solve the problem. Once the understanding is there, the problem is not. The key never meets the lock. The lock is there because the key is not. When the key is there, the lock simply disappears; it is not.

And I cannot deliver that key. All that is borrowed is going to create more trouble, because you are already complicated, and now this borrowed thing complicates you more.

I have heard:

An overworked business executive went to the doctor and was told that he was overdoing things and must get far more exercise.

“Get yourself a hoop and roll it to and from the office each day, instead of relying on a car. It will make a new man of you,” said the doctor.

So he bought a hoop and did what the doctor ordered. He rolled it to the office every day, and the garage housed it during working hours. One evening, however, on the way home he found that the hoop was missing, and the garage hand told him that due to an error it had been returned to someone else. “But don’t worry, sir,” he said. “We will replace it free of charge tomorrow.”

The executive said, “Tomorrow? What do you mean, tomorrow! How am I going to get home tonight?”

If the understanding is not there, then all methods, rather than becoming a help, become hindrances.

And if the understanding is not there and you start looking through my eyes, your eyes are not going to stop seeing. They will go on seeing through my eyes. It is going to be a great complication.

Another anecdote:

“I hear that your husband had his eyebrows all burnt off in a fire at home?” the woman asked her friend.

“Yes,” came the reply, “but the doctor was so wonderful to him. He actually grafted new eyebrows on him, from the hair taken from the hind leg of a dog.”

“That is fantastic!” her friend said. “How is he now?”

“Oh, he is not too bad,” she said. “Mind you, he still has a little problem. Every time he passes a lamp post he looks surprised.”