VBT – Meditation 99.5

VBT – Meditation 99.5

Life Is Insecure

The phenomenon is already dead. The moment you want it to be secure, the moment you want to enclose it so that no new thing happens to it, you are imprisoned in it. Then you will suffer.

Then you will say that this wife has become a bondage to you. The husband will say this wife has become a bondage to him. And then you fight because you have each become an imprisonment for the other. Now you fight. Now love has disappeared, there is only conflict. That is what happens because of the hankering for security.

And this has happened in everything. Remember it as something basic: life is insecure. This is the very nature of it. So when there is love, suffer the fear that the beloved can leave you, but don’t create security. Then love will grow. The beloved can die and you cannot do anything, but that will not kill love. Security can kill. Love will grow more.

Really, if man were immortal, I say love would be impossible. If man were immortal it would be difficult to love anybody. It would be so dangerous to fall in love. Death is there and life is just like a dew drop on a trembling leaf. Any moment the breeze will come and the dew drop will fall and disappear. Life is just a wavering. Because of that wavering, because of that movement, death is always there. It gives intensity to love. Love is possible only because there is death. Love becomes intense because there is death. Think… if you know your beloved is going to die the next moment, all meanness will go, all conflict will go. And this one moment will become eternity. And there will be so much love that your whole being will be poured into it. But if you know the beloved is going to live, there is no hurry. You can fight and you can postpone the loving for later on. If life is eternal, if the body is immortal, you cannot love.

Love is possible only with death. Then we have a question: what is Buddha’s Love?

For an ignorant person love is always part of hate, it always goes with hate. For the ignorant mind, hate and love are just two aspects of the same coin. For the ignorant mind love is never pure.

And that is the misery of love – because the hate becomes a poison. You love a person and you hate the same person also. But you may not be doing both simultaneously so you are not aware of it.

When you love a person you forget about the hatred part, it goes below, it goes into the unconscious and it waits there. Then when your love is tired, it falls into the unconscious and the hate part comes up. Then you hate the same person.

And when you hate you are not aware that you also love – now the love has gone deep down into the unconscious. This goes on, just like night and day. It goes on moving in a circle. It becomes a misery.

But for a Buddha, for one who is enlightened, the dichotomy, the dualism, disappears. Everywhere – not only as far as love is concerned – the whole life becomes oneness. Then there is no dichotomy, the opposite doesn’t exist.

So really, to call Buddha’s love ‘love’ is not good, but we have no other term. Buddha himself never used the word ‘love’. He used the word ‘compassion’. But that too is not very good. Because your compassion is always mixed with your cruelty, your non-violence is always mixed with your violence – whatsoever you do will have its opposite just nearby. You exist between contradictions; hence the tension, the anguish, the anxiety. You are not one; you are always two. You are a crowd, divided into many fragments, and those fragments are opposing each other. Your being is a tension; Buddha’s being is a deep relaxation. Remember, tension exists between two opposite poles, and relaxation is just in the middle, where two opposing poles are no longer opposing. They negate each other – and there is a transcendence. So Buddha’s love is basically different from what you know as love.