VBT – Meditation 85.2
One Is Scared
In death the outer dissolves, but the inner is carried. It is a very subtle material thing. Really, just vibrations of energy, thought vibrations. You carry them, and according to your thought pattern that you carry, you enter a new body. According to the thought pattern, the desire pattern, the mind, you again create a new body for yourself. The blue-print is in the mind, and the outer layer is again accumulated.
The previous sutra is to put aside the body. This sutra is to put aside the mind, the inner body.
Even death cannot separate you – only meditation can separate. That’s why meditation is a greater death, it is a deeper surgery – deeper than death itself. That’s why there is so much fear. People go on talking about meditation but they will never do it. They will talk, they can write about it, they can preach about it, but they will never do it. A deep fear exists about meditation, and the fear is of death.
Those who do meditation, they come one day or another to the point where they are scared, thrown back. They come to me and they say, ‘Now we cannot enter more. It is impossible.’ A point comes where one feels that one is dying. And that point is of a deeper death than any death, because now the innermost is being separated; the most inner identity is being shattered. One feels one is dying; one feels now one is moving into non-existence. A deep abyss opens, infinite emptiness opens.
One is scared, runs back to cling to the body so that one is not thrown, because the earth beneath is moving, is being removed. A valley is opening, a nothingness.
So people, even if they try, they always try superficially; they play with meditation. They are unconsciously aware that if they move deep they will be no more. And that’s right, the fear is true – you will not be yourself again. Once you have known that abyss, that shoonya, the void, you will not be the same again.
You come back, but you are resurrected, a new man. The old has disappeared. You cannot find even a trace of it, of where it has gone. The old was the identity with the mind. Now you cannot be identified with the mind. Now you can use the mind, you can use the body, but they have become instruments; you are above them. Whatsoever you do, you can do, but you are not one with them.
This gives freedom. But this can happen only when THINKING NO THING.
Hmm – this is very paradoxical – THINKING NO THING. You can think about things. How can you think about no-thing? What does this ‘no thing’ mean? And how can you think about it? Whenever you think about something it becomes a thing, it becomes an object, it becomes a thought, and thoughts are things. How can you think no-thing? You cannot, but in the very effort – the effort to think no-thing – thinking will be lost, thinking will be dissolved.Tags: One Is Scared