What Is the Cause Of Unhappiness?
The mind is adept at perceiving what lies in the external world, but it does not know how to turn itself inward and see what is inside.
The Atman, our inner self, is ever awake. It is always with us—telling us what is true and what is untrue, what is right and what is not right. But fear, lack of discipline, absence of self-confidence, and the habit of leaning on others causes us to ignore it. Every time our inner self counsels us to avoid a harmful action and we take that action anyway, we feel guilty. We tell ourselves we will not make the same mistake again, but driven by our inner weaknesses, by our habit patterns, or by social pressure we repeat it. Again our inner voice says, “Hey, don’t be foolish. Why are you inviting misery for yourself?” We hear it and yet we make the same mistake again. This time we feel even guiltier. We keep piling guilt upon guilt, going against the inner voice, and repeating our mistakes over and over. This leads to self-condemnation, and eventually the mind becomes so cluttered and so noisy that it drowns out the voice of the soul.
Living with guilt and self-condemnation is intensely uncomfortable. So what do we do? If we have not learned to turn the mind inward, we turn it outward and look for an excuse to blame someone else. Blaming people and external circumstances provides momentary relief, which is why we cultivate the habit of finding all kinds of problems in the external world. We think He’s a bad person…She’s unfair…Had those hateful people not done what they did, my life would be delightful…Other people are nasty…The world is ugly and cruel. Once this habit is well-established we begin to build a wall and isolate ourselves from others. But that fails to bring either peace or happiness. We begin to lose self-respect and finally isolate ourselves from ourselves. Now our misery is complete.
How can I learn to put an end to this self-created misery?
All problems, pains, and other miseries originate in the mind. The only way to overcome misery is to make the mind composed and peaceful. The scriptures tell us to protect our mind. And further, they say that once the mind is protected we will find safety and protection everywhere.
A mind governed by fear becomes defensive. As part of its self-defense it reacts violently, hurting itself and others in the process. The rules imposed by our society and the laws imposed by our government may offer short-term ways to reduce the causes of misery in the external world, but ultimately we, as individuals, have to take responsibility for eradicating the agony rooted in the depths of our own mind. That is why the scriptures talk about the process of self-transformation, and tell us that it is only through self-transformation that we can expect reformation and improvement in our external environment.
The process of overcoming misery begins with reflection on the purpose and meaning of life. Understanding this purpose intellectually creates an interest in finding it, and through further self-reflection, contemplation, and self-inquiry we nurture this interest. Eventually it matures into a burning desire to find the meaning and purpose of life here and now instead of postponing our happiness for tomorrow. Even the simple realization “I am on the path of self-discovery and freedom” becomes a source of joy, enthusiasm, and self-motivation, and we find delight in working toward that goal.
Tags: Drop Self-Caused Suffering Find Your Own Path Self-Talk
